Petroleum Jelly Women

I think myself a relatively accepting person, however, even I have limits. One of the volunteers in our house, Dom, flies past those limits with the speed of an oncoming Mach6 fighter jet. Dom is....a piece of work. 63 years old, never shuts up, and is intent on offending the entire universe before he dies. That might have summed him up until we all went out to dinner last night, where new heights were attained in his crusade against manners and all things socially acceptable.

All of the volunteers in the house (that is, me, Robbie, Maggie, Archie, our coordinator, Jim (who's a girl), and Dom) went to a nice restaurant for dinner. Conversation ranged from family to hobbies to where we all are from. It was pleasant. It was appropriate. Then from far out in right field, Dom starts talking about pregnant women. Where did this topic come from, you ask? Hell if I know. He moved right along from how pregnant women are only eating for 1 and 1/10th of a person (because babies are small, so don't say you're eating for 2 as an excuse to eat more food or gain weight, ladies) to how when a woman says her water is breaking, it isn't actually water. WOW. Really, Dom? Because I seriously didn't know that until you told me over dinner just now. But no, the conversation doesn't stop there--he procedes to describe IN DETAIL the viscosity and appearance of this mysterious liquid. Apparently, it most closely resembles petroleum jelly. At least, Dom's wife's did when she asked him to reach his hand in their bed one night to check for her. Ew. Gross. Me. Out.

Can I please just say that i believe myself 100% completely justified in hating this man? And if you think that judgment is harsh, just consider for a moment that this is merely one in about four dozen serious breaches of social protocol that this man has committed. He's Canadian. He should know better.

A short list of other things said/done by Dom that night:

Made the "booby-grabbing gesture" with his hands not once but six or more times.
Attempted to rub an actual pregnant Thai woman's belly without asking.

I don't know what to do with this man. He's going to Vietnam this weekend, which will be a lovely vacation for the rest of us. Thank Buddha.